Under Surveillance

I'm going under surveillance. I'm not sure if this involves me wearing a cream mac and a trilby and following unscrupulous people around or if someone is going to follow me home and park up outside my house watching everything I do. If it's the latter they will be very bored.

I spoke to one of the cancer nurses yesterday and so my very worst fears had been put on the back burner and I wasn't feeling quite so anxious about my appointment with the oncologist today.  I'm not out of the woods but I do not need immediate surgery or chemo.  Regardless of being told this, I still had the worst nights sleep and tortured myself that the nurse could have mixed up my scan results.   If any author is looking for some wild ideas for plot lines, I'm your woman. The things I can make up are alarmingly shocking!

The oncologist threw me a curve ball I wasn't expecting today.  He said he had two options. One was to crack me open and remove my bowel leaving me with a Bag For Life or he could leave it for 3 months, send me for another colonoscopy (can't wait) and review it all then.  I hope the delay of 3 months doesn't mean that after that time I will need the surgery anyway.   The good news is that the site where the cancerous polyp was removed appears cancer free.  There COULD be a tiny amount left but if so it is so small it is undetectable at the moment.  I have 3 nodes. They too are small and need watching.  If I had been told this would be the outcome last week I would have grabbed it with both hands but today I'm worrying what three months will bring, of course I am, I worry about what to cook for dinner so I'm hardly going to let this pass by without some sort of drama.

So I'm relying on the carrots to do their best at shrinking these nodes.

I'll keep you posted.